Sunday, June 19, 2016

United States Returning to the Civil War Era

Studying the American Civil War and the 1860's, I see a strange similarity about the US today. Like over 150 years ago, the country is becoming divided with Republican and Democrat. This is basically the same division Americans had. In the 1860's and prior to that, the real division was between north and south, modern and old fashion, rich and poor. Do you see the similarity? Republican and Democrat? There were many conflicts and disagreements which led up to the American Civil War. Like today, the country seemed disorganized and in chaos. Of course then, they had Abraham Lincoln (a Republican), but there are many things most Americans does not know about him.

I found documents stating of Abraham Lincoln's conflicting speeches and decisions. He never actually stated he was against slavery. It may seem this way due to some of his speeches. His main concern was ending the division in the United States. In fact, I have came across documents and other readings that reveal Abraham Lincoln could have been for segregation. One time, he made a speech saying anyone of colour (term for African Americans and other minorities) can be killed. Also he disallowed them to enlist. Later on, he comes back stating he would allow the coloured to enlist into the Union army (with more contradictory statements). That is when the general Robert Gould Shaw comes into the picture. This is one example where Abraham Lincoln would even contradict against his own rules. Actually, Lincoln set out to ship the African Americans back to Africa. However John Wilkes Booth cancelled that plan. By the way, Booth was an interesting character I would like to make another post about.

Another document in 1862 also says in Anoka County, Minnesota, Abraham Lincoln ordered that the Dakota Native Americans would be massacred. Many were outraged over his decision. Abraham Lincoln was not as favoured and liked by everyone as most assume. Even after his death, many showed a strong dislike of him. No, I am not saying Abraham Lincoln was not a good president. However, no one can really speak for someone they never met and wasn't present during the 1860's. Abraham Lincoln was one of the most interesting presidents in American history I do believe however. Although many speak of his presidential failure, Ulysses S. Grant was also kind of interesting. Most believe he was a better general than president. Perhaps with his scandals, it made an impact on the United States today. Oh yes, I read the long list of scandals. He was the president after Abraham Lincoln. Not right after, for he became president in 1868. The scandals arrived in 1869 and continued from there. Grant was another Republican. I believe today, the United States wishes to return to being a Republican country.  

During the time of Abraham Lincoln mentioned above however, the United States was divided so much that Jefferson Davis became the president for the south. The Civil War era may be gone, but what it left behind remains. Several things still exists. For instance, there is still some sort of division, racism and nearly 200 years later the Klu Klux Klan is still an active group. You may call it the United States, but this country is not United. It never really was even when it was founded, and I am uncertain if it ever will live up to its name "United". In fact, I read many documents stating how the conflict goes as far back as the Constitution. It only escalated during the 1820's. Due to this, many predict a second American Civil War is possible. Yes, anything is possible I believe. Out of over 200 years of American military service, the American Revolutionary War and the American Civil War seemed to be the only in relation to Americans. The first attack started in Fort Sumter, North Carolina on April 12, 1861. The Republican party was the first to fire at this harbor. At this time, Jefferson Davis and the south was already seceding from the United States. The south gathered muskets and said they were only keeping them for safe keeping. They knew there would be war however.

So, due to this, I do believe history can make a big impact for the future. It indeed has.             

Ahiska Turks

I recently learned more about my family's heritage of Ahiska Turks, also known as Meskhetian and Akhaltsikhe. What was discovered caused some sort of frustration and relief at the same time. We were glad to have found out about one of many of our heritages. Still, a bit frustrated we weren't told before.

I read about Ahiska Turks originating from Georgia, and between the border of Turkey. Many are unaware their exact origins and history prior to 1926. Also, about these individuals being refugees. Prior to this information, I was oblivious to this race and confused when my step-grandma gave us hints that we have Russian traits. We were like, what did you say? She of course denies telling us this after sharing information about Ahiska Turks. Sometimes my family has Russian accents, but it changes. It now makes sense. I read Ahiska Turks' languages are Turkish (different than in Turkey), Russian and Uzbek. Their presence in Russia, although perhaps not entirely welcomed also is making things more clearer.

Due to the reading I have done, so far I have found out of discrimination and dislike of Ahiska Turks. 2004, was when the US started allowing refugees into the country. They were treated differently than in Russia.

I mentioned this trait due to the race being kind of rare. The pure Ahiska Turks are even rarer. Our family are ones the 100% was not preserved well. Yes, it does seem however they are some sort of a mixed race. The other reason was that there isn't much information on Ahiska Turks. I am still trying to learn more though. All I did learn is their civil rights progress, where they are located and the cultural combination of Turkish, Russian and others. Also similarity in behaviour and habits.

The Ahiska Turks seem nonexistent to me and went through quite a lot throughout history. My mission is to help those such as this. However, I feel a particular race has been given the most injustices, indignities and mistreatment, Native Americans or Indigenous people. Of course I am sure most knows what a Turkish person is. With a simple explanation, it can be understood. However, it is sad when everyone doesn't know what a Native American or an Indigenous person is like they do not exist. When trying to explain, confusion remains. In a way, my family feels a connection to these people; even more now due to our Ahiska heritage. I will continue this later on.      

Spirit Sensivity

Having a sensitivity to the spiritual realm means those that are capable of seeing, feeling and hearing into the spirit world; and things many cannot see. Also this can mean too that the person has the ability for spiritually sensing another person's motives and thoughts. Children are more sensitive to the paranormal than adults, because they are more open minded and they are not considered clouded with the world. However adults can have this same special ability. Spirits tend to target them because they are capable of seeing them. I do not believe in calling it psychic, but others have their own opinion. They are free to call it whatever they wish.

My family has this rare ability, and even more. It was far before we moved into the haunted house. We just were capable of experiencing far more after our move. Our personal abilities:

My mother is capable of seeing spirits, demons and holy spirits. Only being focusing and not focusing, she is able to see into the past of a location and also into the future. My mother is even capable of getting names by focusing on the past. She can know what will happen, even in the far future. The most helpful ability she has is seeing and sensing fully someone's motives, what they are going to do and what they are thinking. She can also look into people's lives by focusing, and can tell how they will die.

My ability grew stronger by the house. I am actually able to see spirits, demons and everything. If someone asks me or if I am curious, I am capable of seeing what happened in any location. My method is closing my eyes and I kind of tune out of my surroundings. No spirit has ever been able to fool me. Beforehand, I can see their true form and their true motives by pretending to be nice and friendly. Like my mother, by focusing as well, I can see into hell and heaven. Hell is frightening, because it is like I am actually there.

My sister is able to see, hear and feel spirits. The creepiest thing I find is her ability to know what someone is thinking. Even if you are silent, she can know what you are saying in your mind.

Unfortunately this ability runs like a facet. Without our control, spirits appear and becomes attracted to us. When seeing them, it is like being tormented by them. It is against our religion to speak to spirits. Therefore, we asks them to leave us alone or just ignore them. However, they seek for someone who can see them and tries to communicate. Also, we can see any crime that is occurring, have insight in someone's life and see what happened in the past without us focusing. That is why I call it a curse. We never wished for this ability. It is like a facet because these events continue, and they cannot be turned off. We try to just deal with our abilities the best way we can. Unfortunately, like what many say, it won't go away.

Friday, June 17, 2016

The Mystery of the Haunted Dodge Durango

Although the chapter seems over for this vehicle, in a way it feels like it is not. Everyone remains haunted by the events that occurred. Also the spirits haven't went anywhere. I looked up the VIN number of the vehicle and discovered many accidents that happened. Hesitation stopped me from knowing if any were fatal accidents. I will continue where I left off though.

Okay, I shall explain the incident with Mark and Debbie. Yes, they were interested in the vehicle when they heard of the bizarre activity that was happening. Our bosses' cousin who happens to be a mechanic examined the vehicle. This was due to our issues. Little did we know this was the beginning of the end. Actually the entire mishap was caused by the roofing company we hired. One man gave us misinformation that the vehicle needed to be moved from the back. Since it could barely be driven, it was towed to the mechanic. He suggested that the vehicle is not worth fixing. We were given ominous warnings not to destroy the vehicle. It was too late however. He had already took it to a junkyard and the vehicle was no more.

This was the wrong time Mark and Debbie performed a seance to communicate with these spirits. History repeated itself. One of the previous owners of the vehicle also had similar problems they started experiencing. The man was hostile, abusive and dominant, even to his wife and daughter. There were fatal car accidents and also a homicide that occurred years ago. My family are also sensitive to the paranormal. I will make another post with details. Many label us psychic and say this is a gift, but I see it as a curse. Anyway, history repeated because the previous owners were shot to death in the same manner, only in the vehicle. All I have to say is the vehicle was attracted to death, fatal car accidents and murders.

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Other Reasons I Will Not Take Pictures Yet

I would like to take a few pictures. I mean, that is kind of required being a living doll. Some even asks why I never upload any photos. However, my living doll appearance is not complete. I am not use to taking pictures of myself also, and dislike bringing attention to myself. Soon I will get over it, but I won't over do it with the pictures.



Makeup Perfection

 

Did you know living doll makeup was the biggest part in looking like a doll? If living dolls remove their makeup, they no longer look as porcelain. Even though we do have natural doll appearances, the makeup will enhance it. No longer looking normal, but an actual doll. There is normal makeup, and then there is living doll makeup. No, I have not yet perfected this. While trying to perfect this, I have been looking at Arabian makeup. I will include this into my living doll career. Unfortunately, I do not have a steady hand yet. Since I discontinued wearing false eyelashes, I am also depending upon the Younique mascara to grow my lashes. It works, but the irritation it causes has forced me to take a break applying the product. Plus pink eye is not very cute for a living doll.




Motivation to Wear Doll Clothing

 

Lately, I have only been wearing Indian/Pakistani clothing. The scarves are my favourite piece to wear. I even get scarves from every part of the Middle East. Also, I wear Native American scarves. Although it is nothing wrong with this (living dolls can wear anything pretty much), I understand I need to wear more doll clothing. Sometimes, living dolls wish to take breaks from wearing this; including the makeup. However, it can be time consuming wearing them. Indian sizes is not the same as Asian sizes as well. I am able to wear Asian sizes, but some things can be tricky to take off afterwards. I find myself yelling for help. Anyone, just help me take this outfit off! The most problem I have issues with are clothing that come from Korea. China, Japan anywhere else, no problem; Korea is where I find major problems. Even the Victorian clothing seems like some of them came from Korea.



Plastic Surgery

 

The second or first important step to look like a doll is plastic surgery. Many living dolls deny having plastic surgery. However, the truth is surgery is required to look completely porcelain. Also to get responses like, I can't believe she's a real person. No, I have not done this step yet. The plastic surgeons in the US are just refusing to perform living doll surgery. Although not typical, those of Muslim belief are more accepting of this tasks. This is only from my personal experiences, nothing else. In order to complete my look, I must travel outside of the US, Japan. 


After getting these three steps down, I will start taking pictures. Not for attention or for anyone else. It would be that I am satisfied with my results for myself.      

Sunday, June 12, 2016

Mouth Masks




These are my mouth masks I purchased online from Japan. For safe keeping, I keep them in their original packages. Many question why wear these masks. Well, there are several reasons.


  • For colds, flu and other illness. 
  • My family has severe allergies. So I find it good to wear them when my allergies would worsen. This is most of the time. I am like allergic to a ton of things.
  • Sometimes, it is good to wear them for discretion and privacy. I dislike being stared at or bringing unwanted attention to myself, or any sort of attention. 
  • Often it is worn for Decora fashion. Being a living doll, these masks can be used for fashion. It is a combination for me. Discretion and fashion. 





This mask was a gift from a dear friend from our nearby nail salon called Happy Nails. Her name is Chloe. She found out I wore these masks, and handed one to me. Also, she told me she will give me new masks every time I visit the salon. This mask is from Vietnam.

I do not wear decorative ones for illnesses. For colds, I switch to the regular medical type ones. I only wear these sorts for discretion, fashion and allergies. My mother and I have figured out the pattern on how to make these masks. So we will start making a bunch. 

Cults

Unfortunately, cults has became a huge part of American culture. The United States contains an endless list of cults. Due to religious freedom, that leaves the door wide open for extreme groups being created. I write about American cults. No, not to add unto the violent entertainment culture. I write about cults to beware and to remind myself that there are such groups that exists. It is not to glamorize this behaviour. Because cults are American culture, they are also a threat. I became interested in cults when discovering another dark piece of American history. So interested, that I began studying cults.

What exactly is a cult? It could mean a group of people led by one person. They require full control and submission. There are eccentric rules followers must follow. Cults are centered around Christianity mainly, but there are other religious cults/sects. This is the typical sect. However, Christianity is not the only main religion. Extremists and also Satanic churches are considered cults. Occult and cult is combined when Satanic practices are involved such as the Church of Satan. Also for instance, extremists such as ISIS are considered as a cult. I recommend the program, Doomsday Cults.

Currently, I am writing two books about religious sects. One is the common American cult, which is a church based off of Christian doctrines. The second I started is about a Satanic group. I chose a Satanic cult because I realized Satanism is also American culture. I am not narrowed to American cults. Know any extremists or cults in any other country, I will study them as well. Here are some cults I have been studying:

  • Ku Klux Klan (and their subgroups)
  • Mormon
  • Jehovah Witness
  • Children of God
  • The People's Temple
  • Heaven's Gate
  • Scientology 
  • Living Word Christian Center
  • Manson Family  
  • Church of Satan
It can be interesting how much or what people would believe. Cult leaders have convinced their followers they are aliens from another dimension, to even convincing them to take their own lives. I find this sort of mind control and manipulation incredible. Followers perform bizarre and extreme acts in the name of God or their leader. Psychology and psychological abuse plays a major key to a cult following. It varies who cults identify as God. Either their leader, God (from any of the existing religions) or Satan. There are so many cults, that I am wary of groups/churches I haven't heard of. Someone will always take advantage of American laws.

I wanted to include something I wished my family was told before. Churches like Mormon and Jehovah Witness claims they are all the same. In reality, they are not the same as Christian. I learned this when studying their churches. Mormons have a separate book than the Bible. It does not teach the same doctrines as the Christian Bible. However, because of the material in the Bible many of these cults can pull anything for their own church. Soon I would like to further explain how. Just don't make the same mistake and get yourself in a cult.  

Monday, June 6, 2016

Why I Chose My Mother to be my Manager

I believe I made a smart decision in allowing my mother to become my manager. By the way, she is my manager for my living doll career and writing career. Here is a list of reasons:

  • My mother has 7 degrees. Her 7th was in Rasmussen College for a Healthcare Management, Bachelor's of Science. Currently, she is working on her 8th degree which is a master's degree in Southern New Hampshire University. She is an upcoming business owner, CEO and is an expert in business, marketing, health and many other things. She has many degrees in psychology as well as many other degrees. While I do my own studying, she shares with me her education. Psychology is highly useful for character development. 
  • Honestly, I would not trust anyone else with my work and any of my ideas. I share my ideas with no one but my mother; that would mean she would be the only to know everything about my projects. I never even told this to the rest of my family or the adoptive family. Anyone else I know they would run off with my ideas. My mother is the only trustworthy individual for looking over my projects and managing my living doll career. Many experts say it is best to get someone other than family or friends to view your work. For example, someone like an editor, professor, librarian or someone else qualified enough. However, I am not that trusting as the rest of the world is, especially when none of my work is copyrighted yet. Believe me though, my mother is not afraid to share her straightforward and honest criticism and/or opinion of my project, character, idea and other things. She has even told me truthfully if my idea wasn't good at all. That is even if I get upset.
  • Being my manager for my living doll career, my mother is not one who would use me for her ticket to get rich or fame. Also, I know all of my ideas for my living doll career will not be stolen by her.
  • My mother has given me great ideas for all of my projects. She shares it without needing something in return for it. Not to worry though. I'll make sure to give credit where credit is due, and I plan to make sure my mother is paid for being my manager.  

Terrorist Groups in the US

For this, I will be more straightforward about this subject. It is a serious issue in the US, especially with the incidents that has happened.

ISIS is a terrorist group based off the religion Islam. What is the difference between ISIS and the KKK? Nothing at all. The only difference are different motives, religion, beliefs and race.

The KKK was founded by Confederate soldier veterans in 1865. During the 1920's was when the cult reached its highest and most violent moment in time. They may have dwindled a bit, but never left. Today it proves that the cult has always been around. 2015 and 2016 I believe is when they grew stronger. There are many groups such as the KKK that were founded. You have Neo-Nazi, Skinhead, NRA (was founded similar to the KKK), White Nationalist, Aryan and others. They mainly hide in the shadows or in the woods, but now they are no longer hiding as much.

The Klan continues to involve themselves in terrorist type activity, make terroristic statements and acts out violence. They have many weapons that are illegal to the rest of the US. Somehow these groups are capable of obtaining them. I have heard these groups state they will enter public establishments to harass and kill all who are not their kind. As stated, they shall come with smoke bombs, explosives/bombs, machine guns, rifles, pepper spray, flamethrowers, thermonuclear weapons, nooses (of course), brass knuckles, and other weapons. What is worse is that the KKK is not all talk. They have performed these acts before. I do believe they will strike again, like they have almost everyday. These groups may say they are not violent, but they indeed will never hesitate to attack anyway they wish. This has always been a group of hate, seeking for violence, bloodshed and chaos. They are known to be sadistic, callous and heinous. It is alarming to watch members teach their children to also hate. The young ones have also been known to be violent. Despite all of this, by the first amendment and others I am sure, the US has made it a law that the KKK are protected. They have rights to have their "freedom of speech" and recruit members just as long as it isn't violent. However, plenty of times they are violent. Nonetheless, the law favours them and does nothing about the crimes. Don't depend on the police or FBI to help you when having a problem with the KKK.

The KKK are not as secretive about recruiting members as they were. Now, it is not uncommon to see recruitment fliers and messages in public or on doors.

The KKK worries me since this has became a growing issue. Their beliefs are of Anti-African American, Anti-Jew, Holocaust Denial, Anti-Arab, Anti-Muslim, Anti-Hispanic, Anti-transgender/gay, Anti-Catholic, etc. Basically anything that they feel goes against the Bible and that is not their kind. They perform all of these acts in the name of God, and believe this is what God wants. All of their beliefs are based solely upon their own interpretation of Christianity. The KKK feels those who are 100% white are only accepted and is superior over everyone, over all other races. Of course 100% Europeans in other countries are also welcomed into their cults. They are strongly against race mixing, especially if their own kind mixes. This is dishonor and a disgrace. The reference is from one piece in the Bible where God divided everyone. In the beginning, due to arrogance, people spoke in different languages and were scattered abroad. There are also many suggestions in the Bible saying God wishes for everyone to remain with their own kind. This is the key element the KKK uses as reference.

No, it is not wrong to be proud of your heritage or what you are. Hate, prejudice and violence is not okay.     

Friday, June 3, 2016

Everything Halted

I haven't been able to work on my first novel series due to my recent move. It can be a little difficult to write while preparing for the move, and learn Japanese, Korean and Chinese. Plus I am still learning Arabic. I have put many languages on hold to focus more on Japanese however.

I never dealt with anything like writer's block before, but went through distractions. Studying Japanese and Korean have taken most of my time. This is with the process of moving to Japan. Preparing to move is even harder when we continue to experience paranormal activity. The spirits are becoming more physically violent. Despite all of what my family endured, it is difficult for me to move on. Everyone can say this house is evil, especially those who read the book. However, I discovered a peace towards the end despite the experiences. Perhaps it is nothing but an illusion? I am not sure, but those who enter the house can also feel it too. The items I have found in the house will be packed and brought with us. I just hate ending my book and leaving without ever knowing the history of the house. All everyone will be given are what ifs and questions. I hear some times it is best to never know. Still, it would be nice to discover at least who built the house. With all of our searching done in vain however, will it be an eternal mystery? 

Living Doll Plans: Favourite Styles

I learned of the few required steps taken in order to become a living doll. It can be a process, in which some things can take longer than ...